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I found myself yesterday in my favorite shopping mall in Medan, Sun Plaza. The experience would have made me ecstatic on a normal day. I haven’t been to a mall in almost two months and I should be skipping my way inside.

But yesterday was different. I felt suffocated.

The moment I entered the mall, it didn’t feel right. I thought I was just adjusting. I decided to walk around first to build momentum. The ball never rolled. I decided to spend time in the bookstore. Maybe being around books would help. Still the same.

I was out of the mall in less than an hour without buying anything. Not even a cup of coffee. That was a feat. I was actually dying to get out of the place. After a quick call for the driver to pick me up, I was out.

I actually don’t know what happened.

It must be an environmental shock.

It must be because I have been so used to living in the midst of the forest for a long time that man-made buildings with all those for sale happiness don’t entice me anymore.

It must be because I have been doing a lot of self-work recently and have been reading stuff about simplifying life and living with enough that I saw the items around as clutter.

Whatever it is, it was an interesting experience.

I guess I am evolving. It is so exciting.

Here’s to moving towards more meaningful experiences with less ecological footprint.

And I really don’t need extra shoes now. Really.

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