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Rewind to two weeks ago.

I got a Ping in my BBM.

It was 7 AM. I was sprawled in bed covered in the usual white duvet that is a standard in most hotels. It was a day off. I was meaning to sleep in because hello, it is a day off so I was firing expletives in my head for that person who pinged me at such an hour.

I checked the phone.

Fernanda: Are you awake?
Me: Barely. Only one eye is open.
Fernanda: Wake up! Go online in Skype.

Silence.

I think I fell asleep for a good few seconds.

Fernanda: Where are you?! My students want to talk to you!
Me: Bekle! (It means wait in Turkish.)
Me: I am still in bed crazy woman! (Some people don’t know the concept of time difference. Omaygad!)

fe and me

And that was it. I went online and saw gawking sixteenish to eighteenish Brazilian students who look older than the 30 year-old, barely awake, clad in my pajamas me asking questions like why do Asians love to eat rice and is it really true that I am 30 because honestly I look like 12. Ok, I made that up. I don’t remember anymore what we talked about. As I said, I was barely awake.

I don’t even know why I agreed to talk to them with my unwashed face, unkempt hair, and barely functioning neurons. Maybe that was it. The brain was still booting. Oh, one thing I remember though, they wanted to see how my pajamas look like or if I am really wearing pajamas. These Brazilians.

Anyway…

I miss Fernanda.

It has been almost two years since we were physically together. The last time I saw her was when my Turkish host family hosted a farewell dinner for me in their home. She came over together with other dear international and Turkish friends to bid me goodbye as I pack and fly back to the Philippines the following day.

There were no tears that night. I think. But we know that it could possibly be the last time we will see each other in this lifetime. What are the chances of meeting again? We live in the opposite sides of the world. I am from the Philippines. She is from Brazil. A few days after I left Turkey it was time also for her to go. We will be crafting our real lives back home and will be busy to make sense of the years that we are blessed with.

Today, as I lie again in my bed covered with the white duvet, I came across this blog on Bucket List. Inspired to make mine too, though I know I have done it several times in the past but have lost the paper where I wrote my stuff, I grabbed my red journal and started scribbling.

I divided it into two groups, Bucket List for 2013 and the Ultimate Bucket List. My concept and titles were not really original. I just copied it from the blog. And I found myself writing in the Ultimate List, Meet up with Fernanda again.

We know we always lament that we want to see each other. Being the Latina that she is, she is so sappy and melodramatic every time we talk about it. It sounds gayish to a point.

Photo courtesy of Ercan Kurt, a good friend we met in Turkey. I stole this pic from his Instagram.  Friends who lived with me in this city knows exactly where this shot was taken.

Photo courtesy of Ercan Kurt, a good friend we met in Turkey. I stole this pic from his Instagram. Friends who lived with me in this city knows exactly where this shot was taken.

But I guess that’s how it really is. I guess we represent one beautiful part of each other’s lives. And it is with having each other, reminiscing all those good things again and again, that we keep those memories alive. Those memories that we are clinging to and we hope will never escape us ever in this life.

So yeah, that’s one of the ultimate things I hope to strike out from my list before the time expires. Good luck to us.

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