It has been almost a week. I thought I was ok. I thought I was doing ok. This morning I woke up with that knot in my chest. It seems I am still not.

A friend told me yesterday over the phone that I am unusually happy. He is getting scared. I kind of thought the same thing. It is a little scary. That’t not normal.

But what is the right process in dealing with this? People have their own ways, own time frame, own path. I am volleying from one side to the other. The only thing clear is I still haven’t won over this. Not yet.

I will be camping in a while for three days in a place where calmness abound. I just want to clear my head, get a different perspective on what I am going through, and expunge all the negativities once and for all if possible.

My sister said I need this.

I am keeping my hopes high.

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